Friday, I hit the gridiron for the first time in about two years. I played flag football with some friends, and the harsh reality set in that as slow and weak as I was when I played high school ball, I am even slower and weaker now.

I more or less pulled a Maurice Clarett. After taking two years off I came back 15 pounds over playing weight and my once blazing 5-second 40-yard dash is now a lack luster 5.5.

I played defensive back in high school, so I thought that once I got back on the field my natural sports instincts would take over on “D.”

On the first play of the game the guy I was covering ran a fly route down the sidelines, and it was then that I realized how far I have dropped off physically.

As I turned to run with him I fell flat on my face only to look up and see the guy I was covering fly by me on crutches and catch a touchdown pass.

So, after the first defensive series, I thought maybe offense would be better.

But, you would be surprised by the effective nickel defense the group of girl scouts I was playing against could execute. I tried to run a slant over the middle, any receiver’s worst nightmare, and after the troop leader lit me up she threw me a package of thin mints and told me to have a nice day.

I got a chance to make up for my early errors when I was playing running back, and we reached into our bag of tricks and pulled out a toss pass. I caught the pitch and looked down field while the defensive end that had a merit badge in the power rush was in my face. I aired out a duck that was picked off and taken back for a touchdown.

But there is some good news. No, not about car insurance. Despite my 0-1, 1 interception game, an NFL scout noticed me, and I’m reporting to the Bears tomorrow for practice.

Dan Renick is a senior journalism major. If you would like his autograph on a 8’x11′ glossy glamour shot since he will be the new Bears starting QB you can do so by e-mailing him at

[email protected].