Jem was an inspiration to most doll-toting girls. The star of the 80s animated TV series was a career woman by day and girlband rockstar by night whose pink hair, LED flashing earrings and high fashion made her “truly outrageous.”

She was one of the first independent women exposed to our generation. We could be whatever we dream.

Since then, ‘Sex & the City’ has inspired us in our adulthood, and even Barbie has announced her breakup (or separation) from Ken.

We are independent bachelorettes.

However, what our generation needs most is a balance between sexual liberation and reputation.

Recently, I overheard two males share a conversation about sexual escapades that would be viewed as acceptable to most males, but quite offensive and insulting from a woman’s point of view. They were laughing about both hooking up with the same girl just days apart from each other. One guy paused and commented on feeling bad about it until the second guy chimed in “Why should we feel bad? She should. She’s the whore.”

Although society claims to view women and sex differently, (even if I do not agree with promiscuous behavior) let’s face it: the same stereotypes exist. It’s OK for women to want sex, but not want it too much.

Males have the reputation of being “players,” while we are “skanks,” “sluts” and “hos.” They walk the “stride of pride,” while we take the “walk of shame.”

Having brief sexual encounters doesn’t make you viewed as an equal, it makes you a pawn.

The scales are tipped on Eastern’s campus to favor males in our guy to girl ratio and simple “supply and demand” somehow brings out true competition for male attention driving some to measures as desperate as hitting on other girls or agreeing to unprotected sex.

But why do we let males hold all the cards?

Surprisingly, a federal government survey of 4,600 college students found that slightly more male than female undergrads are virgins.

Why are our standards lower?

The Chicago Sun-Times series “Sex on Campus” interviews students across the state to get their perspectives on one-night hook-ups without emotion or commitment. Their openly admitted eagerness and acceptance in the articles is what psychologists warn will set our generation up for future relationship troubles.

We may have more social power than we did in the 1950s, but the reality is we still lack as much power in relationships with men as they do, according to a 2001 dating report commissioned by the marriage-minded Independent Women’s Forum.

Clearly casual sexual escapades aren’t gaining much ground for our gender.

There are ways other than through casual sex to liberate yourself. We need to stop selling ourselves short and putting ourselves in danger.

Be in control and independent by holding out for commitment and love or at least respect.

When the vodka waters and rum and diets are empty, “Take Me Home Tonight” begins to play and the smokey steam creeps out the bar doorway with a flood of people, snap out of the sticky haze and re-evaluate your after-hour plans.

You don’t have to give up your rockstar night life or bank on a dream house, but you should behave safely in whatever city, even Charleston.