I’ve been neglecting a friend lately, and my guilty conscience forces me to address this issue publicly.

This friend is very protective, incredibly useful and always there waiting to help me out. When we’re together, I can’t help but feel all warm inside.

But as of late, we’ve been growing apart. I hesitate to be seen in public together. In fact, my sadistic side actually looks forward to not spending time together.

My friend, of course, is my winter jacket.

During the winter months, I embrace any opportunity to leave my room without my winter jacket.

A glimpse of sunshine in the morning equals no winter coat. If it was warm yesterday (like 40 degrees), no winter coat.

After spending far too much time walking around campus in bitterly cold weather, it seems I’m not the only one who feels this way.

Why are there coat-haters?

Well, maybe it’s because we all like to convince ourselves that it really isn’t February. By acting like it’s May, things seem to be less stressful.

And there may be nothing worse than being out, whether at a bar or a party, and being stuck in a bulky winter coat.

But some students are taking this way too far.

One of the last times I hit the town with my coat, it was absolutely freezing. It was the kind of cold that leaves your cheeks red, your ears numb, your eyes teared and your language filled with things like, “(Expletive deleted), it’s (expletive deleted) cold!”

Anyway, I was shivering my way to class when I saw someone walking towards me wearing a hooded sweatshirt – a gutsy move. I admired his anti-jacket stance until my eyes drifted towards the ground (standard reaction when walking by a stranger).

My admiration quickly turned into disbelief – and later into anger – when I noticed he was wearing shorts.

His anti-pants philosophy has haunted me since.

Maybe it’s time to face the harsh reality of winter head (and jacket) on. This actually lends itself nicely to metaphor or simile or onomatopoeia.

In life, it’s often our nature to just avoid stressful or uncomfortable situations by ignoring them. It’s like that phone call we don’t want to return or that bank statement we’re too nervous to look at.

People, myself very included, tend to pretend these things aren’t forcing us to take action, and then we procrastinate, or we block it out. Out of sight, out of mind.

Instead of pretending it’s nice enough for sweaters, sweatshirts or fleeces, I vow to more actively wear my winter coat.

I hope some of the guys who are tempted to throw on a pair of shorts the next time the temperature jumps above 37 degrees decide to go with some pants instead.

I extend this urging to cover up, though I never thought I’d say this, to the women of Eastern too. (Immediately after typing this past sentence, I developed a twitch on my left side. Also, hell froze over.)

While putting on my jacket before going outside to smoke (cough, cough) will require a massive life change, I know I’ll appreciate the warmth.

Hopefully, a positive life change is in the works, all because some jackass wore shorts. I’ve never been so positively affected by a man’s calves. And God willing, I never will be again.