Today is National Evaluate Your Life Day. Yes, it’s time to look at yourself in that giant body mirror and say who am I? Where is my life taking me?

Not happy with the answers? Don’t worry, it’s also National Cookie Month so go grab a couple cookies and make yourself feel better. Did I also mention it’s National Character Counts Week? Put on that smile, frown or give a blank stare to show everyone who you are.

No matter the day, week or month, there is a special occasion for it. Think your birthday is special? Well it’s not because there are probably a couple of holidays already assigned to it – mine being Mudd Day (Multi-user Dungeons and Dragons) on Dec. 20.

Let’s hope your birthday isn’t Nov. 19 because how much fun can you have on Have a Bad Day Day?

I began thinking about this subject while walking through the Wal-Mart greetings card section and stumbled upon Sweetest Day and National Bosses Day cards.

These two “holidays” are hardly marked on my calendar, and I’m guessing not many people took the time to observe them or buy a card for that matter.

Where do all of these holidays come from and why are so many of them nationally recognized? Most of these bizarre holidays have an official sponsor and are registered. But who would actually observe some of these days?

I know where this holiday came from. With half of the Charleston population being made up of squirrels, residents can take Jan. 21 to celebrate Squirrel Appreciation Day.

Yarrrr! If you like a patch over your eye and a parrot on your shoulder you would love Talk Like a Pirate Day on Sept. 19.

Enjoy those hairballs just a bit too much? Get yourself in the action of National Hairball Awareness Day on April 29.

Are you a boy named Sue or a girl named Lenny? Change it. Get a Different Name Day is Feb. 13.

Everyone needs exercise if they want to stay healthy. But who would have thought plants need some too? That is what Take Your Houseplant for a Walk Day on July 27 is for. Walk on stilts because it is also Walk on Stilts Day.

Who doesn’t love sea monkeys? Well I don’t, but they also have their own day. May 16 is National Sea Monkey Day.

Have plans on May 3? Cancel them. Nothing could be more important than Lumpy Rug Day. Put something on or under that rug so it looks lumpy. Lumpiest rug wins a prize.

Not even Christmas gets its own day. I guess it wasn’t important enough to assign A’Phabet Day or No “L” Day a different day. This is a day where people can send out cards with all the letters of the alphabet excluding the letter “L”.

The recognized months even contradict themselves. March is both National Eye Donor Month and Save Your Vision Month. So what is it then? I don’t see how you can save your vision if you’re going around and donating your eyes.

All of these days are out of control and it seems like there is a special occasion for anyone and everything.

And how does this column end? I don’t remember. I can blame that on July 2.