Senior year is such a paradox. On one hand, you’re supposed to have a lot of fun and enjoy your last year of freedom before stepping out into the real world. On the other hand, you can’t have too much fun because you’re too busy trying to figure out the next phase of your life – getting a job!

My senior year of high school was the exact same way, except instead of trying to get a job, I was trying to get into college. Looking back, I spent way too much time worrying about school and my grades. Being in honors and advanced placement classes will do that, and I did not want this year to be the same.

Unfortunately, two months of my senior year of college have gone by, and I feel like all I’ve been doing is working, homework or trying to get a job. Although I’m told repeatedly that employers care more about what I did in college than my grades, I am still trying to get improve my grade point average.

I didn’t realize it would take me an entire weekend to put together my portfolio, which is now chock full of a good sampling of all the work I have done while in college. Mock interviews, job fairs are all of which are cramping my style.

The thing that scares me though is I wonder if my efforts will be enough. The job market hasn’t been good lately. Am I doing what it takes to get hired? Several people I know are going to graduate school to put off the job search, but that is not for me. I’ve been in school too long and have no intention of coming back.

Getting my portfolio together isn’t the half of it. Now I need to figure out where to send my resume and clips, how to write a cover letter and how to not screw up a job interview.

I had several friends from home who went to their freshman year of college this year. I gave them all the same piece of advice: Don’t spend all your time studying. Get out and have some fun.

Why don’t I follow that advice?

I have an assortment of things I would like to do before I graduate, and sadly not many of them are being accomplished. Instead I am wasting away in the worries of what I will do for the rest of my life.

While working in the real world this summer, I vowed I would to my best to enjoy my last year of freedom. Unfortunately, once I got here that changed. My last year of freedom is becoming my first year in the real world, with an apartment, a car and bills to pay, with an extremely limited cash flow. I can’t help wondering how next year will be any different.

Hopefully I’ll have a better-paying job.

Last weekend, I took some time out of my homework and finding a job frame of mind and I reverted back to childhood.my roommate and I carved pumpkins. I ditched my pile of homework and cleaning to do something fun for a change.

It was a refreshing change of pace. I need to do that more often.

I guess the moral of the story, as I learned this weekend, is don’t spend all your time focusing on the important stuff. Get your nose out of the books and do something fun.

Sure, by this time tomorrow, I’ll be freaking out because I didn’t get everything done on Saturday. But I won’t have this year again, so I need to make it memorable.

Yes, through my efforts, I hopefully will be able to impress a potential employer and get a job, but I don’t want to look back on this year the way I look back on my senior year of high school. Because when I do, I think, why did I waste all my time?