Some things I have learned in college

Jackson Bayer, Columnist

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I, like many students at this institution, am almost done with college. I like college, and I have learned lots of things in my four years of undergraduate studies. Although I could simply list those things and you could read them and maybe find them interesting and maybe even learn something, too, that’s not how this is going to go. No, I think it’s much more interesting if I review some things I’ve said on social media (follow ya boy on Twitter @jxcksvn) and talk about what I learned in college that way. With that said, everything I quote in this piece will be taken from my Twitter profile. Let’s get things started, shall we?

“elementary school: going to the library is fun

middle/high school: libraries are for nerds

college: the library is essential to my survival” -November 18, 2015

One of the first real lessons I learned in college was the beauty of the library — I don’t think I ever truly realized how much use I could get out of it. Need to study? Go to the library. Want to find literally any book you can imagine? Go to the library. Want to have a nervous breakdown and receive unlimited amounts of sympathy? Go. To. The. Library.

“i’m in college and i still had to sit at the kids table yesterday” -December 26, 2015

So, yeah, adults are probably still going to treat you like a child, even though you’re in college and old enough to vote, go to war, buy adult magazines, see rated R movies alone and eventually buy tobacco and alcohol. Oh well. You know what else I learned in college? The kids table is more fun than the adult table anyways.

“college is dope man i was just sitting in class next to this girl who was knitting the entire time and nobody even questioned it” -April 5, 2016

In college, you can (mostly) do what you want. Also, don’t ever let my English professors see that quote. They might not let me graduate.

“today i saw a girl walking on campus in her pajamas w/a blanket & stuffed animal & idk if it was a halloween costume or not” –October 31, 2016

Again, in college, you can do what you want. If you want to wear a Halloween costume to your 8 a.m. class, then absolutely do it, because you probably won’t get to do it at your boring job five years from now. Also, I have regained love for stuffed animals in these last four years. Sometimes you just need someone to hug, you know?

“college continues to kick my butt yet here i am still having a butt to kick” –December 10, 2018

Have I sometimes wanted to drop out of school and move to New Zealand and become a hermit? Sure, who hasn’t? But at the end of the day, I still come back for another butt whooping because I enjoy college, and I know I’ll miss it once I’m gone.

Jackson Bayer is a senior creative writing major. He can be reached at 581-2812 or at [email protected].